Universal Cargo - Tips - Stress of Children

Tip 10 - Handling the Stress of Children

Moving to a new home can be traumatic for both parents and children. Parents , who often feeling appropriately stressed-out themselves with both the moving preparations and the prospects of many changes in their jobs and lives, may miss or misinterpret some of the signs of their children's distress.
The stress of moving to a new home, whether it is down the block or across the world, is felt most acutely by those who did not make the decision to move.Generally, the family members who have the least control over where they live, and are therefore most likely to react poorly to a move, are the children. Many parents worry either too much or too little about the effects of a move on their children. Studies have shown that a certain amount of emotional turmoil or depression is normal and may even be beneficial.
Sometimes they have a more difficult time falling sleep, wake up more during the night and are more likely to get upper respiratory infections. This pattern is very telling: it is considered that the depression that usually follows the period of agitation among highly stressed children may be adaptive since it prevents them from becoming exhausted and allows them to cope with the stress of the move.

For older children, the key issues appear to be how well and how quickly they adjust to their new school. Studies show that most children have relatively few problems making this transition. Those who have the most difficulty are usually children who also had trouble at their old school. In general, it appears that boys have more trouble adjusting to a move than girls do. Junior high school students have more difficulty than any other age group. Children who move from small elementary schools to large junior high schools appear particularly vulnerable to problems.
Usually a few weeks or even a few months of lowered grades or complaints about not fitting in after a move are nothing to worry about. If a child is still having difficulty adjusting to a new school after six months, that's probably a sign of a more serious problem that requires professional help.
So what can you do if there's a move in your future? Here are some suggestions:

As moving day approaches, reassure toddlers and even preschoolers that they will be coming along with their parents on the move. A surprising number of young children see their family's possessions being boxed, sold, or thrown out, and wonder they will suffer the same fate.
Put off redecorating your children's new rooms for a few months unless they ask you to. Having the old furniture arrangement is like taking a security blanket. It eases the transition to the many other new things they are facing.
Pay attention to the ways the design of your new home influences how you spend time with your children. The increased privacy of a larger house can sometimes make it harder for children to adjust. The new home may not have the same type of central family gathering place, such as a combination kitchen and dining area, as the old one. You may not realize you're not spending as much time together as a family as you used to.

This problem may be compounded if family members have different schedules from those they had before, so that it's more difficult to eat dinner together. For the first few months after a move it's often useful to schedule family meetings or other all-family events as a way of maintaining lines of communication.